How to Manage Holidays for Separated Parents

Kids of separated parents are often put into turmoil over the holidays as the parents lobby with one another to determine where the kids are going to spend their special day. Gone are the concerns of last minute gift shopping and events — parents are concerned about where, when and how the kids are going to spend their holidays.

Parents find themselves feeling guilty about the separation and the inability to spend the holidays with the children and are known to shower the children with material gifts to try and make up for the lost time.

There are two types of experiences that the children have throughout the holidays; they’re either excited about the prospect of having two celebrations, twice the gifts and of course, twice the fun. Other children find themselves feeling guilty about only being able to spend the holiday with one parent. What can parents do to help reduce the stress of determining who the kids are going to spend the holiday with?

Plan in Advance

Make sure that the children and parents plan in advance, and that the children are aware, of who where and how they are spending the holiday. This can help to avoid last minute negotiations.

Consider Switching

Switching from year to year is one of the most fair ways to divvy up the holidays that are being spent with either parent. Consider using odd and even years, or creating a system that works for your family.

Get Support

A mediator can help to create a schedule and make decisions without being biased. The services are available to help parents that are unable to come to an agreement and are a must for parents unable to compromise. The mediator will take into account all of the aspects of the situation and help make a decision, as well as assisting in communication.

Get Real

When you’re going through the situation, it’s important for the parents to realize that you’re not going to be able to get your way 100% of the time. Someone is always going to “win” and whether you’re deciding or a mediator is, it’s important to let it go.

Make Traditions Outside of the Day

Making traditions outside of the actual holiday can be a great new tradition. No one says that Christmas morning has to be celebrated on the actual morning of Christmas. Skipping the drama of the day and making new family traditions can help to keep peace (and the schedule) between separated parents.

Our family lawyers and Toronto divorce lawyers are here to assist you. Contact us today for your free consultation.