How to Tell Others You Are Getting Divorced

A guide by Fine & Associates, the Family And Divorce Attorneys of Toronto

One tricky part of divorce proceedings that you may have yet to think about is informing others about your divorce. Telling friends and family members about your divorce could be one of the trickiest parts of your divorce yet, but with the following tips, it may be easier for you to speak about it.

Related: Your Divorce Checklist

Who Should You Tell?

Deciding to get a divorce from your spouse or being served divorce papers is hard to process. It may help you process your divorce by confiding in friends or family members about it. If you think they may be supportive of you and your decision to end your relationship, it may behoove you to inform a close friend or family member of your divorce. They may be comforting during the divorce proceedings by telling them about your divorce.

However, feel free to tell others about your divorce. It is okay to take a moment to process all the divorce proceedings and the events that lead up to the divorce by yourself. It is important to remember that if you tell someone about your divorce, they may not necessarily keep this information to themselves.

Who Shouldn’t You Tell You Are Getting Divorced?

If you have a friend or family member that is particularly prone to gossiping, you may only want to inform this individual about your divorce once you have had the chance to inform others. You do not want to tell other people about your divorce who will spread your news to others in a potentially negative light, disregarding the factual information about your divorce and creating their own versions of events.

What Should You Say?

It may prove beneficial to you to provide bullet points about your divorce announcement to the specific individuals you choose to tell. For example, you could say something like the following:

• “We are excited about the one-on-one opportunities to parent our child ourselves, and our child will always come first.”
• “We tried couples counseling and various other methods of staying together, but we believe a divorce is the best solution for the both of us.”
• “We have amicably decided that we wish to divorce. I’m excited for the future and what it holds.”

Whatever you decide to tell other people, leave it on a high note as much as possible and direct the conversation back to the people you are speaking with. You could leave your announcement with an open-ended question like “What new for you and [your spouse?]”

Speaking with your friends and family about your divorce is a great way to define your divorce to a third party. Some people have even confided in their friends and family that this is a “long time coming,” and both parties are pleased. Whatever your situation is, try to define it as best as possible so that your friends and family can understand where you are coming from and try to support you best.

Related: 5 Myths About Divorce

Have questions about your divorce?

You can call the trusted family law attorneys and associates at Fine & Associates for a free consultation at (647) 557-5120.