Lessons to Learn From Other People’s Divorce

Whether they’re good or bad, our experiences can teach us a lot. Luckily, we don’t have to have already gone through something to learn from it. Other people’s advice and discoveries are often available to us, even more so now that we have the internet and can reach out to each other across the globe. Here are some lessons that several divorced people say they learned from the experience.

Life can be hard or awesome or both whether you are married or single.

Your relationship status on government forms doesn’t dictate whether you’re going to be happy or not. The health of the relationships you have with yourself and others are what determine if being single, married, dating, or anything else is working for you. As the Huffington Post points out, “everyone has their own unique set of circumstances and problems.” You married, divorced, single, and engaged friends all have their own problems and joys, as do you. The important thing is to find what works for you, whatever that happens to be.

Settling isn’t worth it.

In response to an AskReddit question about lessons learned from divorce or breakup, many users stated that it’s better to split than settle, and that “not happy but comfortable” isn’t good enough. Similarly, compromise is good, but not if you are sacrificing who you are or how you want to live. Instead, “find someone who compliments your beliefs and values.”

Whether you’re married, dating, or single, being open to new people and new experiences is key.

Gloria Pierson shares with the Huffington Post that she lived “a fairly insular lifestyle” when she was married, but that once she was single again, her life became “richer and more interesting” when she started going to new places and meeting new people. Of course, being married doesn’t mean you can’t have new experiences and make new friends. What’s important here is to have an open attitude to the world.

Letting go can be freeing.

An unhealthy marriage is both painful and restrictive. While the process of moving out and moving on can be extremely difficult, it can also be healing. And letting go of the bad feelings toward your ex can be as important as letting your former spouse go. Gloria Pierson says that her anger toward her husband was “like drinking poison” and only ended up hurting her.  As the Huffington Post explains, “Letting go can help you free up space you’ve held hostage in your heart of bitterness and anger, and make room for love and happiness.” Loss can be an opportunity for discovery through personal growth and new possibilities.

We’re here if you need us.

If you find that your relationship is no longer capable of being a healthy one, we’re available to help you through every step along the way.

Fine & Associates Professional Corporation is a well-respected Toronto Law Firm that prides itself on providing quality personal service and favourable outcomes in Family Law and Divorce Law.

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