Should You Be Offended by Your Fiance Wanting a Prenup?

Imagine this: you and your fiancee have just sat down over coffee (or something stronger, depending on how the process is going) to work on wedding planning. Between discussing the merits of deejays versus live bands, she blurts out, “I want a prenup.”

The conversation comes to a halt. There are so many preconceptions about prenups (short for prenuptial agreements) that you’re not sure how to feel. Read on to learn whether you should be offended at a request for a prenup or welcome it.

What Is a Prenup?

A prenup (also known as a marriage contract) is an agreement signed before the wedding that sets out rules for property division in the event that the couple divorces or one member of the couple dies.

A marriage contract can also be signed after the marriage takes place, but then it’s no longer a prenuptial agreement (“prenuptial” being the Latin term for “before marriage”).

Why Do People Sign Marriage Contracts?

“Why would anyone want to sign a marriage contract?” you ask. “Doesn’t such a document doom a marriage to failure?”

There are two schools of thought when it comes to answering that question. The first school of thought says that a prenup creates a backup plan of sorts for couples. It discourages them from putting in the necessary effort to make their marriage successful.

The second school of thought says that marriage is a partnership on a few levels (including an economic one). When you enter into a partnership, you want to know where you stand. For example, if your spouse-to-be is drowning in credit card debt, you wouldn’t want that to remain a secret. And if he or she owns properties that are quite valuable, it would be in your best interest to know that. The goal of the marriage contract is to ensure that all of that information is out in the open, so each partner is completely aware of what he or she is getting into.

So, Should You Get Offended If Your Future Spouse Asks for a Marriage Contract?

The choice to take offense at your beloved’s request for a marriage contract is completely yours. No one can tell you that it’s right or wrong to feel something.

That being said, take a second to consider why you might get upset about your fiancee’s demand. Do you believe that it’s unromantic to talk about money? Does the idea of a marriage contract upset you because you think that it’s a disincentive for couples to undertake the challenging work of building a successful marriage? Perhaps this request signals a lack of trust on your betrothed’s part – it may seem as though he or she is concerned you’re only getting married for the money.

Before you get upset and say or do something you might regret later, take a deep breath and ask your intended why he or she wants a marriage contract. Honest and open communication is the bedrock of healthy relationships. Money can drive a wedge between even the most devoted of couples, so talking about these issues before you get married can save you a great deal of heartache in the long run.

Turn to a Legal Expert for Help Creating a Marriage Contract

If you’re married and interested in creating a marriage contract, you need a lawyer. Legal professionals are experts at creating these documents. They’ll write the marriage contract so that it will stand up to any legal challenge.

Fine & Associates Professional Corporation is a well-respected Toronto Law Firm that prides itself on providing quality personal service and favourable outcomes in Family Law and Divorce Law.

You can click here to contact us, or fill out the form on the right free private phone consultation. Or call us at the phone number at the top of the page.