Parental Alienation and My Child

Parental alienation describes a behaviour in which one parent acts to undermine an otherwise solid parent-child relationship. It consists of turning a child or children against their other parent via manipulation causing a child to reject one parent.

What is Parental Alienation in Custody Disputes?

Parental alienation is a common negative factor in many custody disputes, and the forms of such alienating activities can range from speech aimed at denigrating a parent or interference with access to a child.

The worst-case scenarios involve one parent fabricating allegations of abuse to cause unreasonable fear in a child.

While “parental alienation syndrome” does affect children most directly, the core issue is often related to the negative influence of a parent.

It can be manifested as an actual disorder, and it comes about via a form of “brainwashing” where one or both parents try to indoctrinate a child to destroy trust. While this sort of alienation is generally caused by parents, it can also flow from non-custodial actors like extended family and friends.

The Maximum Contact Principle and the Child’s Best Interest

The Divorce Act describes a “maximum contact” principle, and that legality is designed to ensure that all children have full access to both parents, but only so long a child’s best interests are served. Parents who ignore mandated “access schedules” called for by a court order will be subject to penalties such as fines or – in particularly egregious cases – complete loss of custodial or visitation rights.

One case law precedent, Gordon v. Goertz, held that the importance of preserving the child’s relationship with his or her psychological parent is a keystone to a child’s well-being. The decision also noted that the evidence exists to support the fact and that evidence suggests the parental relationship itself “may well be the most determinative factor on the child’s long-term welfare.”

A decision handed down in Ontario during 2010 found that in a case where a mother damaged a father-child relationship beyond repair (and had her spousal support payment reduced to just $1.00 a month) the mother’s actions in creating a parental alienation scenario were “evil.”

It’s held by the courts as a fundamental principle that, in cases of separation and divorce, Canadian children should be protected from the effects of parental conflicts.

Related:  Your 2023 Guide To Father Visitation Rights 

Signs of Parental Alienation in Children

When children become ensnared in parental conflicts, sudden and unwarranted changes might appear in their behaviour, and those signs can indicate the conditions of parental alienation activity could be present. If a child suddenly no longer wants to spend time with a parent and withdraws from contact, it may well be a sign of parental alienation. If a child or children suddenly reject most forms of affection or use unexpected language inappropriate for their age, they may be cause to suspect alienating behaviour is at fault. Subtler emotional responses from children might also include signs of anxiety, fear or unwarranted upset associated when a child visits an “access” parent.

The negative net psychological effects of parental alienation on children can be startling and arise unannounced, and they can leave victims of parental alienation bearing emotional scars which carry on into adulthood.

What to Do if You are Being Alienated from Your Child?

If you become aware that your former spouse or common law partner is interfering negatively with your parent-child relationship, there are some steps you can take.

• First, reach out to a trusted family law lawyer to help you consider court proceedings. The judiciary is always on the side of the child and works to benefit parent-child relationships. Courts will take all necessary measures to thwart and reverse any actions aimed at alienation.
• Second, do your best to hold on to your relationship with your child. Keep your contact positive despite any challenges, and above all don’t try to counter-attack the alienating parent.
• Last but not least, contact a psychologist or counselling professional who specializes in these types of parental alienation syndrome cases. They can help you work toward stopping the problem in its tracks or repairing any damage already done.

If you need help in dealing with the complex legal issues related to parental alienation situations, the experienced family law attorneys at Fine & Associates are ready to serve you and help preserve the stability of your relationship with your child.

Schedule a Free Child Custody Consultation.