Do You Recognize The Early Warning Signs of Divorce?
What are the telltale signs that your marriage is on the rocks? There are different signs of impending divorce with each unique to certain situations. Some people think that their marriages would never end in divorce only to get surprised later in life when sitting in a family law court. If your marriage is falling apart, you could get help from a marriage counselor.
In cases where one partner is a victim of domestic violence, or one of the spouses is a heavy drug user, divorce is inevitable. Marriage counselors advise that it is wise to deal with marital issues as soon as they emerge. Failure to deal with marital problems could lead to build up of hurt feelings and resentment. Knowing the warning signs of divorce could help you plan ahead.
You No Longer get along
For a marriage to be functional, both spouses have to understand each other and agree to work together. You may not agree on everything but it’s important to resolve your differences through communication. If you find both of you are reluctant to work together even in simple situations, your marriage could be headed for divorce.
You Constantly Imagine Life without your Spouse
If you find yourself often daydreaming about how life would be without your spouse, it’s a warning sign that you could be headed for divorce. If you find that there are particular issues that make you long for the single life, you could talk to your spouse about it. If both of you do not agree, you may consider seeking professional help.
One of you is Emotionally Disengaged
Communication helps to relieve stress and create a healthy bond between spouses. For a couple to feel connected, they have to be compatible spiritually, mentally and sexually. Spouses bottle up feelings when they are afraid of verbal or physical retaliation. When the emotional spark starts to wither away, both spouses start to drift apart.
Negative Defense Mechanisms
If you cannot allow each other to express your concern or you are constantly dismissing your spouse’s needs, you are at risk of divorce. It’s difficult to get along with a spouse who is constantly criticizing your beliefs. If both of you cannot solve problems amicably without having to engage in negative defense mechanisms, it’s a sure sign of an impending divorce.
Your Spouse is Physically Abusive
A spouse who is a victim of domestic violence lives in fear. The afflicted spouse cannot communicate effectively because he or she is afraid. If you feel that the bad actions outweigh the good ones, it’s a warning sign that your marriage may be headed for divorce. Most divorce attorneys will advise their clients to file for a divorce for safety reasons.
One of the Spouses is Reluctant to Solve Marital Issues
When one of the spouses if uncooperative and avoids conflicts, solutions to marital problems cannot be found. Spouses who avoid solving marital problems have a tendency of dismissing the concerns of their spouses. The other spouse is always responsible of finding solutions to their marital issues.
You are dwelling on Bad Memories
Spouses who keep dwelling on past marital problems are likely to develop a negative attitude towards their future together. Spouses should understand they could differ when it comes to certain beliefs, how they choose to handle their differences has an impact on the present and future perception of their relationship. Spouses should know that no partner can fulfill another. Most spouses enter marriage with expectations which they think will be fulfilled by their partners, failure to meet these expectations lead to frustrations and conflict.
Lack of Intimacy or Affection
When spouses drift apart, the same applies to their act of intimacy and affection. Sexual intimacy strengthens the bond between couples. If you find that you are not getting intimate with your spouse or that you hardly show affection to each other, it’s a warning sign of an impending divorce. Some spouses will attribute this to having fallen out of love which implies that they have no feelings for the other person.
Change of Focus
Healthy couples do not allow other aspects of life to come before their marriage. When focus begins to drift to other areas such as their children or careers, spouses tend to spend less time together. This could make both spouses to pull away emotionally and with time, they stop confiding their feelings in one another. The result is an empty, unfulfilling marriage which can ultimately end up in divorce.
Marriage Counseling is not working
Marriage counseling is mostly the last resort couples look up to in a bid to save their marriage. Couples who choose counseling show that they still love each other and are willing to do what they can to save their marriage. Keep in mind that marriage counseling does not work for everyone; some couples will not find a solution to their marital problems even after the process. This is a sign that you are no longer compatible with your spouse and sadly, divorce or separation is the only solution.
If you have tried and failed to find solutions to your marital problems, you should consider filing for divorce of separation. The process can be tedious and confusing especially if your’re not familiar with the law. As such, it’s wise to seek help from a divorce lawyer. Contact our experienced Toronto divorce lawyers; we will fight aggressively to protect your rights and interests during your divorce!